What It’s Like To Have High-Functioning Anxiety When It Stops Functioning
It was a Saturday. I was dressed up to go to dinner when I had my first panic attack. My heart was racing. The room was spinning, and I felt like maybe this was the end of my life.
I couldn't take it anymore. I was working for an NYC-based PR agency as a Vice President. I'd climbed that corporate ladder. I was on the opening team for a top luxury hotel, and when I should have been my happiest, I was miserable.
No one tells you that getting to the top won't make you happy.
Our cultural narrative is anchored around a big a$$ lie called the egoic illusion of success. IT GOES LIKE THIS: If you get to the top of your profession, become a leader, get married, buy a nice house, get thin, never age, write a book, and impact millions, you'll feel completely fulfilled (and even poop 🌈 rainbows). Okay, I made that last part up, but you get the point.
Our culture says: HAPPINESS + SELF-LOVE CAN BE EARNED OR PURCHASED. It's no wonder that anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in the U.S., affecting 40 million adults in the U.S. alone.
I'm on a mission...
To help others reclaim their self-worth and to live a fully expressed life. I believe that if everyone were to do their inner work, we would stop blaming others for what we believe we lack. We would take responsibility for our actions and our experience of the world. We would show up with more compassion and tolerance for others. This would lead to a profound drop in debt, drug use, crime, depression, racism, suicide, and violence.
USED TO BE:
a luxury hotel marketer & spiritual fitness instructor
morning decaf coffee
CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT:
books, travel & long walks
NEXT DREAM TRIP: